Why I hate the academys slightly less… part 2

Sorry about the pause and general delay of this blog but I think like many others I am still slightly in shock (the good awe kind!).

So I’m near enough to the front to be able to breathe comfortably and see His microphone stand (which is the view in the photo, the only one I took as that was such a failure and out of respect). This is when the people rage started when a woman began to ease her way past me so I stood firm and gritted my teeth.

The 3RDEYE girls came on to a huge roar and asked us politely to not film or take photos of the gig. I cheered the notion, we were about to witness Prince in all his glory, there’s no way I wanted to watch it through my own camera lens let alone someone else’s but most of the selfish crowd booed, neglecting the whole point of what was about to happen… factor 2 in the people rage’o’meter!

After a bit more waiting music started and then his voice and then I think I passed out, standing exactly still, and then I remember the stage being alight and let’s go crazy (still the song I want played at my funeral) live from 2 metres from me…

By the end of the first tune and by that I mean about 20 mins later as anyone who has seen Prince live will attest he makes every song an epic piece of art as different to the song you hear all the time as possible without being a different song, the girl next to me and I were great mates and happily rubbing body parts that would be obscene if we were naked. She had a huge grin and I lost the ability to speak!

The room calmed down slightly and I was angered to hear people talking above Prince. I was still soaking up the fact that he was so close, I could see the hair on his head, the lines of his face… sometimes when he looked to his left it felt like he actually saw me, I saw his cheeky little grin, that gorgeous moment when he realises he has everyone in the palm of his hand and I was just dancing… (I have sciatica or something like it which means I’m in pretty constant pain in my back and arms and legs etc… I completely forgot and danced for 2 hours solidly!). But the tall bloke in front of me wasn’t dancing, he was talking and to be fair his mate didn’t seem to want to be talked to.

I must take a little personal moment here to mention Sam Jones, a mainly insignificant ex boyfriend of mine who up until he talked during my friend’s acoustic performance had possibilities of being The One. During the argument which followed (my disappearing after) the talking during the gig he told me he loved me for the first time to which I replied “No you don’t!” and that was effectively the end of that. I’m not saying the bloke at the Prince gig was The One but imagine how disappointing it would be if you met someone (he was pretty fit) and everything was going well and then he talked all the way through a Prince gig… I’d have to dump him there and then but then he’d want to talk more… I was feeling glad to be free and single.

It turns out the man in front was not single and his undiscerning girlfriend was one of those selfish trollops who think it’s acceptable to get on her boyfriends shoulders. This was all stopped by a butch looking skin head dude who went from scaring the twat to swaying gaily to the music. Thank you that man, back to Prince.

If any of us had to list our favourite Prince tunes in order I’m sure it would take us ages and change every time we remembered another classic tune. Of course I love the classics, let’s go crazy, take me with you, if i was your girlfriend, sign o the times… but one of my fav favs has to be She’s always in my hair. So imagine my joy when He starts to play it, preceded by “This song was recorded in the 80’s” it had to be good. The tall annoying bloke looked disinterestedly at his shorter friend and shrugged his shoulders. Because he didn’t know the song it was fine for him to talk all the way through, luckily I can filter twats out pretty well. The skin head however obviously couldn’t and my dance trance was interrupted by the tall bloke being pushed back past me followed by his girlfriend shouting abuse at the skinhead who was trying to get his hands on the bloke (who was desperately trying to run away from the bloke who was 6 inches shorter than him!). Once they had gone we gathered round the skinhead to calm and soothe him back to Prince and I thanked him for actioning what my brain could only imagine.

He played Hot thing, he played so many classic tunes I was delirious. I found myself a few rows back after I’d given up on the hip tango with the lady next to me. I kept thinking I’d go further back where I’d have more room to dance but then I’d see Him again and be transfixed and unable to do anything but dance.

And I’ve been bought up on Prince so I know how to dance!

Unfortunately it seems I found myself in an area where people didn’t dance or have fun. The woman next to me/behind me kept digging her elbows into me then looking away whenever I turned around. I thought she would be 18 but she was old, older than me at least! She ended up making her man stand next to me because Oh My God I was having the time of my life and dancing to the hero telling us all to dance! I don’t have an issue with boring folk who just want to appreciate the music but really people… it’s called a dance floor for a reason! I wouldn’t have thought it possible to stand so still whilst listening to the most amazing musician play the most amazing soulful funky music! Until I not only saw it, I had it rammed next to me. Then I ended up in front of (no word of a lie) a 6ft5 hells angel type (of woman) who also thought I was having too much fun and that she was also going to poke me and try to push me about… to be fair she could have inflicted a lot more pain quite easily… I just want to know why?!? (Fair enough the first ladies bloke was looking at my boobs a lot but does that sort of jealousy really exist? I’m a hot girl at a gig, who am I going to go for – someone hot and funky and capable of fun or some grey old man standing still and putting up with his girlfriends jealous bollocks?! Or Prince?!)

It was here that my moment of clarity happened… How am I ever meant to be happy with a man (or woman, not completely ruled that out yet) when I know Prince exists? I’ve grown up loving this man who is the sexiest man alive, who can sing, who can dance, who can play anything pretty much… let’s face it, Prince is magic! How is any mortal man going to live up to that?

I can’t really leave this like this but there isn’t much more to say… I can’t remember a lot of what happened, it felt too much like a dream at various points but I will say I had the most life affirming weekend I’ve had since I was a kid and its all thanks to Prince, his crew, the Manchester Academy and my wonderful twitter and facebook friends, esp. Morganna… Thank you.


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